what has my life become... without soccer?

So it is official... I am officially a "non-student-athlete" and I do not like it one bit. Now that my weekends are completely free, I am able to watch every Gonzaga women's soccer game (and the men, when they are home). The girls had 2 games this past weekend. And for some reason, it seemed to really have hit me... I no longer am able to play competitive soccer anymore. 

I am not sure what it was about this past weekend that made me so envious of the girls who are still able to play, but I was definitely, dare I say it, JEALOUS. It is true what they say... college goes by so fast. It seemed like my 4 years of playing collegiate soccer was really like 4 months. I loved every second of playing. It was always the best part of my day... to get out on our beautiful practice field and just play. No school. No job to worry about. Just me and the green. And now, it has all been taken away from me...

So what is the next step? An indoor league or a measly adult league... but nothing is the same as playing in college, competitively. I miss soccer so much. And to make it worse, I have been talking with a doctor and a neuro-psychologist about my concussion issues. My brain has been virtually destroyed from all the "heading" I have done in my 18 years of playing soccer. Yes, I said it, 18 years. I have been playing since I was 4 years old. And now, my passion for the game could really be done due to brain injuries. And that.. well, sucks.

I cannot thank my Gonzaga family enough for all of the good times I had playing. I will miss ALL of my team mates because they meant the world to me. I loved those girls. And I have never regretted my decision to attend GU.. seriously, the best experience of my life.. thus far.